To Be a Girl...

Yes, dear readers there will be an update. Plus a maintenance, I can assure you that. I'll make sure to improve all the posts here, if I'm not so busy. I greatly apologize, not being able to write up to now. you'll be glad to know a lightning streak of events has happened during the last year. And I have much to tell, with additional words I'd like to share with you all. Don't you just feel special? XDD. Anyway, let's move on. But first, (yes, there's a but) a WARNING if you please.

WARNING: Upcoming Content might be... "too gross" or, "too ridiculous to handle" ...read at your own risk.

Since last post, I was a 14 year old teenage-girl (that apparently took home the title for last year's prom, Ms. Junior) who's been through ups and downs, like all other people. There's always a difference though.

One's life can never be the same. Although some other people might share the same experiences as you do, it makes it easier to understand one another. And, other experiences, are just some that can never be avoided.

Like for example, one day, you wake up but don't get up at once. Instead you wake up feeling funny, and then you realize you have a stomach ache. It stings a little but still tolerable. As you move to get up, you take off the warm blanket covering you. You gasp in surprise; you feel disbelief at first. Then, checking that you're in fact not hallucinating, you (of course) rub your eyes. The image won't disappear. You rub your eyes again... Nope, not disappearing. You run to the bathroom and have a closer look, and you find:


blood on your pajamas.


Okay... okay. Maybe not EVERYBODY can have this kind of experience, unless you're a girl. But, hey, these things can happen right? Oh, just agree with me~!

At 'ta, reader. Want a flashback? I thought so.

Gotta wait next time though.

Preview:
"WHAT THE FREAK WAS THAT!?" XDDD

Self-pity...Waiting...

Okay, so it was prom last night. Before, the dance, I had my make over, I felt so very excited, and very pretty. It lasted for a whole hour and it was honestly refreshing wearing make - up on. But then, when I was able to finally arrive in the building for the annual promenade, I was crest fallen when somebody implied that I was too simple and that my long gown wasn't exactly following the motiff, well, screw you, pig. She actually made me feel bad and I almost felt crying on my table. That night was supposed to be the best and memorable night of my life, but in the first order of events during the evening, I was utterly negative.

Not to mention the hurtful feeling I had when the guy I liked actually indirectly-dirctly rejected my feelings. This reminded me fo the guest speaker's words. "look unto the heart of the person you are dancing with. ", I actually thought everything was going to be all right... He asked me to dance, and I asked to dance with him, but, then I half-wished that I shouldn't have asked him, 'cause that was when he... ... Anyway, at least I got to tell him that I want things back to normal after dancing, and we kind of got to talk to each other, so most probably, we'd finally get back to being friends and I could finally move on.

Then, I saw the ladies around me, I felt that I'm not worth being around these such elegant and gentle females. I wished that I got to the bathroom and stay there until the night finally ended, but then Jennie (I love you, Jen) cheered me up, and got me back to my feet, told me words that I forgot, but knew that I needed to hear. And Patricia, for being there, hugging me in endless care and concern. And Denise and Justine, filling me with such wild yet possible dreams, and great hope.... I love them so much, and I treasure them so much. Thank you, guys.

Then there's King, my supposed 'main partner of the night' , thanks to him, I knew totally I wasn't alone, for he and I had a lot in common that night, we both started feeling really down that we felt like wanting to die, then he told me these words I shall NEVER forget...let me translate it. "when you're really feeling depressed and feel like all hope is gone, God knew what to do, he gave a very simple yet wonderful and beautiful miracle to make everything worthwhile..." King, thank you for twirling me when I told you to. Thanks for giving me a shot to be my partner when we were nominated to be Mr. and Ms. Junior last night at Prom.

Then there's Jexter, one of the most wonderful things that has happened to me that night. He was such a gentleman, a great listener, very charming, and just very sweet, and a good friend. He escorted me, and I actually felt pretty flattered when he offered his arm to accompany me and when he asked to dance with me (I got to dance with him, either twice or thrice, I think). I also felt really lucky while we were dancing (when I asked him to dance, not the other way around), he declined to exhange partners with a couple of our classmates dancing, though I accepted when his crush and another guy offered to exchange. Since I knew he liked her, I played cupid with JC so I ended up dancing with him the next second, fully knowing that Jexter deserved to dance with someone he liked to be memorable, besides, it's prom right? However, when I danced with him again, (THIS WAS WHEN I GOT TO DANCE WITH A FEW GUYS, ODDLY RETURNING ONCE AGAIN TO MY CHAIR, WATCHING ALL THE GLOQING FACES), he surprisingly apologized for a while ago, but I shook it off, telling him I didn't mind at all, then I asked him how did it go with his dance with the girl he liked, and he seemed not wanting t talk about her. I asked him if he indeed liked the girl, but he denied... hmmm... great lie Jexter. But then he told me to sing a song we were dancing to for him, I complied, having fun myself. He asked me for the title, and I answered with the title and the singer(TRYING TO GET THE FEELING AGAIN BY CHRISTIAN BAUTISTA), he nodded with the same serious and tad mysterious expression, though I kind of liked it.
Then I got to dance with the young voldemort, telling him (I was hesitant) that we were dancing to one of my favorite songs... "Stolen by Dashboard Confessional", and voldemort, being a known gentleman, tried singing the words with me, then we seperated.....
Jexter returned for me once again, my favorite song was already halfway through, then he suddenly asked me who I wanted to actually dance with from the third year, the year I belong to... I answered him, and he still held that serious expression with a bit of surprise. By the end of the night... ... he was one of the two guys I kissed on the cheek. He was the first guy who gave me a decent turn to dance.

Melben, thank you too. You were one of the guys, along with Jexter, I kissed on the cheek, just because... thanks for the dance... I appreciated it. It was one of the most memorable dances I've had in my whole entire life.

So.... you wanna know what is the miracle? I won something the whole night, something I didn't think possible except dear Ate Justine, (love yah ate) I won a postion, I was Ms. Junior. What a night it turned out to be... I was half amused but totally surprised... pictures you ask? You might want to be patient...
LOL.
p.s. THE FOOD WAS GREAT<>

Passers-by

okay... so today is my prom... I'm about to eat, and then take a shower. (rolls eyes) For the first time, a whole situation I'm supposed to get nervous or excited... I'm not. Isn't that just weird? Plus Brad had some damn scissors and cut up the cover of my poaoperback book... I HATE BRAD! HE PRACTICALLY SLASHED MY HARRY POTTER BOOK! DAMN HIM! ...for now.

Anyway, right, prom. I'm going to bring lip gloss, perfume, powder, money and a brush... not to forget my PWT's cd, EVERY SECOND COUNTS -deluxe edition (smiles). Oh yeah, and my invitation. (glances bemusedly) Yeah, the dare, blah blah, I guess I could care less about that. If he doesn't ask first, guess I'll have to ask... Psh, as if that'll happen. Too cowardly for that. (winces) so, I'll be posting pictures soon... of me. in the prom. in my gown, in make-up. Big deal? nah.

Oh yeah, they're going to be serving roast beef... I wonder if mashed potatoes and gravy's going to be there? WEll, one thing's for sure, I'm looking REALLY FORWARD TO THE FOOD. Just great, I'm hungry. Plus, I hope I'll go to the coffee shop right after prom, on midnight to two. Plus, I'd like to dance with ms. junior (winks at pats) and my ever good friend jennie (winks). Damn, I'm hungry.

Oh yeah, news flash, these days, me and Voldemort-- the younger one, have been bumping into each other lately, though I try not to acknowledge that, but since I have no pride left, I'll let it go. Seriously, I will, don't worry. It is aprroximately 11:50 AM. I'll take a bath at 12 pm.
Okay, gotta go, I'm really hungry.

I promise to upload some pics... I promise.

P.S. did I mention that I just love Go Fish and Uno cards? (winks at El Segundo and El Desperado)

I have 3 minutes...

Well, it started exactly last Sci-tech week when word broke out about who my crush is. Plus, 'the guy I like" knows about it. I hate vj, honestly. Plus someone who told marshmallow. Damn.



And then fast forward, missing on the parts of excruciating teases from marsh and my best buds, then finally stopping here. Where everything was awkward between me and the guy. I really tried hard not to glance at his way,'cause he might think otherwise, which would be such a pain. But I really can't deny when we would meet eyes, which is really weird, 'cause I never felt him glancing at my way. But, anyway, he likes another girl from our batch. which brings me once again to say how much I am annoyed/slightly hating marsh. Stupid exams!

And now, because of the whole section's desperate need of passing his subject, I had to actually claim the spot of being in the whole trade. Does that mean I actually like my section?Hm... quite particular.



Thanks to Jennie, who was officially my spokeswoman the whole entire damned day, I was actually being altruistic; I was going to risk to be dying of shame for my grades. The whole class better be in my funeral!



All right the dare is to dance with my 'supposed crush' at the prom for one whole song. 3 minutes, maximum, and in return, marsh would hold back his red pen of evil failures.



It sounds really bad, honestly. I really didn't want him to get involved, I just know in my gut that feelings are going to get hurt... I don't know if any of his feelings would get hurt either.

But... right now... I'm just thinking of his mother. His mother is going to be there for heaven's sake! I feel like breaking down. And marsh even said it was the best offer he had ever gotten, I swear he just loves to torture me!



Oh, yeah, did I say that my spokeswoman asked him for me if I could dance with him and he actually agreed to it? How confusing is that? Believe me, it is.



I'm also worrying about something else. I have three minutes, 3 damn minutes to dance with him, it wsounds too long to comporehend. What am I going to say? Should I rehearse?

First things first:



"Oi, sorrysorrysorry! Kung gusto mo, mag-back out ka na lang. Nahihiya ako tuloy eh... andito yung mommy/daddy mo."

and if he says yes...

"Sure ka? Okay lang sa'yo?"

and if he nods or says a yes.

"thank you!... Kasi si SS..."

then... I don't know if he'd hold my hand or offer an arm... but when we get to the dance floor...

I'll be as silent as a mouse... and curse marsh as if my life dependson it... or maybe I'm just exaggerating... what do yu think?

I am So Guilty... I miss them

I know, I just feel so guilty, the title says it all... you want to know why? Because I haven't really started on my computer project yet, so I promised myself, to do it straight out the whole day tomorrow to start and finish it... wow, now I feel good, 'cause otherwise, I'm going to commit suicide if I don't do the task seriously, or if I don't do a good job. So when I'm done, I'll make sure to save it at once in my USB, to be ready to be transferred to a diskette downstairs... yeah. that's it. Whew! Now, all I have to do is finish this quick post and find my computer handout for the project. Yeah that's it... (fidgeting).

Plus, I'm a bit saddened at the thought of my friends not coming in contact, 'cause I miss them so much! Plus, I'll be bored for the rest of the New Year's, I'll be staying in a place where there's a lot of beaches... I'm not a beach person when it comes to the Holidays, weird huh? Anyway, I'm still happy at the thought that my girlfriends are out there having cherishing moments with the family, and I'm kinda having it here too. Only, with not much traveling. (Thinking about computer project again) Damn it! I have got to cool off! But I will once I'm done with the bloody project! Sigh...

You know what else is going in my mind? My writing skills. I really have to exercise them. Woah, I'm a teenager and I'm already thinking about the great responsibility I have for my petty skill. But, nonetheless I have to start finishing up my one-shot fiction for the Harry Potter category. (bites lower lip) But how can I do that when all those other great fictions are screaming to let me read them!? Once again, I find myself guilty.

Plus, there's the DVDs my mother borrowed from my aunt, a whole bloody collection of the greatest eye-tearing romantic movies ever! They're just so damn good, I can't help but be delayed by, "MUSIC AND LYRICS", "MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE" (the most especially), and "SERENDIPITY", I was just in the middle of "AUTUMN IN NEW YORK" when the bloody player heated up. So I had to stop. Sigh, I was always such a sucker for the classics and the romantics, not forgetting the musicals. (PHANTOM OF THE OPERA) and in other news, I'm beginning to really love Fred Weasley, did I mention he could be so hot when I imagine him with his flaming red hair? and Colbie Caillat's songs, truly, she is the appreciated "Queen of myspace".

So, before my stomach starts churning I have to bid a farewell so that I can get a move on with the project.

Happy Christmas, everyone!

It's been a long time, and I'm finally back...

Okay, It's been a very looooooooooong time, but seriously, I haven't really lost my love for expressing myself, although it doesn't appear that way. From where I come from, it's almost Christmas, I might not have enough time to make another post by Christmas so I guess I'll just say a "Merry Christmas" in advance, so here it is:

Merry Christmas, each and everyone!

Oh yeah, I've just got interested in Harry Potter only recently, but I'm sure my 'obsession', as a 'friend' put it, will soon pass. Though it kind of annoys me why that 'friend' of mine have to be so bothered... but oh well, I kind of understand how it feels when the only thing makes you such a unique person is kinda taken away from you by somebody else, and you just don't want to give it away or share it. But, isn't it CHRISTMAS, people?

Plus, I'm in Hufflepuff (according to a quiz). I'm not saying anything that could put me any position to oppose it, besides, I love the house, but my 'friends' think I should've been in Ravenclaw. Most of the quizzes I took would result to Gryffindor, but the only quiz I thought was honest was when I was in Hufflepuff. Okay, I better stop now.

Oh yeah, it's the second day of our quiz today, tomorrow's the last day for exams, thank you very much. I'd like to acknowledge a 'friend' who just forced me to write something in this blog even though I should be studying right now, but since she says she doesnt trust me *rolls eyes* into writing a post, I decided to prove her wrong.

I better go now. Tomorrow's the day where some 'friends' are coming over to my place to sleep.I'll keep ya'll posted, don't worry If, I find the time not being so damn stressed!

Take care!

Riding the Endless Memories of the Field Trip... part two

To tell you the truth, I myself along with Jen and denise entertained the thought of the ACTUAL Shroud of Turin being in the country... But when we thought all hope was lost (corny, huh?) Suddenly, we found it... 16 ft long and 4 ft wide. "Indescribable.." is what I can comment about it.
To all Filipinos: I encourage you to attend and see for your very own eyes the Shroud of Turin in Mall Of Asia, for they can only put it up up onto this December.

In other news...
for every story, there are always two sides, don't you agree? Here's the negative part of it...
Right before I was going to leave, my mother decided to tell my dad we were leaving when my dad suddenly broke out and said I wasn't supposed to go. But, in the end, after all the hard pressure, I'm thankful that my mom took me down to school even after my dad said no. At that time, I was feeling a sudden pang of betrayal... don't ask why.

Another is that for the rest who are wondering... especially to Pats and Jen, that I suddenly had the weird sickness a.k.a. "Monece-sharing-and-refusing-food-from-others-in-the-bus-
syndrome" was not actually normal of me, I know.. but the real reason why is because of my ulcer acting up. Honestly, it lasted in the WHOLE trip, even throughout the visit to the exhibit.

...I'm sorry I didn't tell you, I wanted to be treated like everyone else in the bus, not minding anything at all. Because I know you would spend your time worrying about me and my upset stomach that you wouldn't mind your own fun time in the trip. I have to tell you though, I made a pretty good job hiding all of the pain.

Plus, there's another thing I know I shouldn't be telling you, but this is totally personal... and stuff... so I guess that's all to it then.

Riding the Endless memories of The Field Trip...part one

I got back from the field trip yesterday and man do I have a lot to say, mainly, I have to say it sucks, except with all the times I had on the bus. Here is the list of stop overs we visited to get to Manila.

1. Siyesta (what's the correct spelling of the name?) - I ate my breakfast here... I bought noodles and drank it, but I shared some with Denise and Melben.
2. Treats at Caltex- I bought Hot Chocolate, oh yeah my seat mate was sleeping on the two seats so I had to give him some time. He's naturally a deep sleeper.

Moving on to the list of places we visited in Manila:

:first was Ateneo de Manila University. All I did was hoping for a bath room, went to an Art Gallery and got back. Though I never really did find a bath room... You can imagine how many hours I have been holding that on!

:second was San Beda College in Rizal, but I never really did see any college, but we got the chance to see the AMAZING CAMPUS. I totally love the library! Oh yeah, and I finally got to the bath room. Ah, sanctuary! Did I mention the whole school building looked like the capus you saw in East High of High School Musical 1 and 2?

:third was... Avilon Zoo! I loved touching the owl and the eagle. It kinda made me think about the greatest creations God has ever made. So I'm pretty thankful for the trip from this point on here. On the way to the zoo, I ate my packed lunch with my seatmate and Melben, we sat together in just two seats, I guess we had pretty small butts to fit all three of us on the seats.

:Then the most awaited, MALL OF ASIA!!!! I immediately thought of the Shroud of Turin Exhibition here and was even more determined to find the place for the exhibition. We watched an Imax movie, a documentary about the wonders of the living sea creatures, narrated by Johnny Depp!!! I love his voice! It was dreamy and so calming... I have to say I did enjoy it, plus the parts when I screamed at one triler about a T-rex, but, that's another story.

Then after, me, Jen, Denise, and Pats went out together to find the ice skating rink, (with the thought of the exhibition temporarily off my mind) but instead of going the right way of the building, we went the other way instead and saw the place where the one and only SHROUD OF TURIN was!!! It was actually going to start at 7 PM, but we we realized we were going to leave at 7:30. (we already the paid the ticket before we got to know this, the price of the ticket for the exhibition was Php 250.00) But thanks to the daring of us all, Jennie Rose T. Lin a.k.a. "The Swimming Shrimp", hooked us up in a 30 minute VIP TREATMENT edition of the exhibition presentation. Did I mention I love Jennie?

I have to tell you some parts of the journey to the past where Jesus Christ was wrapped around the body with the details where He prayed for 40 days and 40 nights then was severely tortured to the point where He was judged under Pilate, was crucified then to His last words when he was hanged on the Cross, then to the miraculous point where He rose on the third day.
"Onto the the tradition of showing the Shroud of Turin for 3 to 4 times in every CENTURY" Surely, I felt blessed to see the sacred treasure that was left from the Medeival times, the world's most precious treasure, the most studied artifact.... THE SHROUD OF TURIN, it was a once in a lifetime experience.

They do not know if what was shown on the Shroud of Turin was really the face of the Lord Jesus Christ Himself, but if you were to ask me, I would leave you the last words that was left onto the last of the presentation of the exhibit before we were to see the actual Shroud of Turin....

"When reason ends,

faith begins..."